Say Goodbye
by AmyNChan
Summary: Luella is having a hard time grieving the loss of her son, even after the funeral. Perhaps she needs a push in the right direction. Warning: songfic, sad


_**14AmyChan: Okay, I found this song on YouTube and I couldn't help but write a oneshot on it**_

_**Luella: Amy, you made this one quite sad…**_

_**14AmyChan: I tried to make it bittersweet, but you're right. It really **__**is**__** sad…**_

_**Gene: Well, Amy doesn't own Ghost Hunt!**_

_**14AmyChan: Please enjoy! *gets ready to hand out handkerchiefs at the end of the story***_

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_**NOTE: Evidently, songfics are evil and must be banished... So I did some finagling. Listen to the song, and when the cues come, you'll wanna be in the third verse. Trust me, you'll want tissues.**_

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Luella sat in the middle of a dark bedroom. Two years ago, a boy had lived in this room. He had made messes in this room. He had done his homework in this room and he had called girls in this room. He had made plans in this room, both silly and serious. He had planned a future for himself in this room.

And then it had been taken away.

Luella clutched at the comforter she held in her hand. It was a source of comfort, somehow. Like a blanket that a small child would hold in the middle of the night, as though it would repel the evil monsters and goblins of the night. However, Luella was facing no childhood fear. This was the terror no parent should have to go through.

She was in intense mourning.

It had been three days since the funeral. Oliver had brought his brother home and he had been properly laid to rest. The service had been modest, and the only colors to be seen had been black and the white flowers in every person's hand. Ever since Martin, Luella's husband, had managed to coax her into the house, she had somehow found herself in her son's room and had stayed there.

Her _late_ son's room. Her darling Eugene's room.

Luella choked back another sob, as she had been doing for the past two years. For a long stretch of time, Luella had hoped that Eugene was not dead, and lack of a body had allowed her to carry on in that delusion. Until four days ago, when the body had been returned to England. Her delusion had been completely shattered, and Martin had been planning the funeral arrangements for a long time, so the funeral had been held the very next day. Luella could have only gone through the motions; her heart had felt so broken.

Yes, part of her was relieved that Eugene was no longer missing. And yes, she was somewhat glad that she could gain closure. However, the grief was simply overwhelming her at this point, the hopes of a mother for two long years finally crashing around her ears.

Luella bit her lip as she tried not to cry. She could not understand why she was not openly grieving. Why she could not cry for the boy she had loved, raised, nurtured, and worried over as a son. Why could she not allow herself to grieve properly for her dead child?

These questions whirled around Luella's head as she clutched to the comforter of her late son for comfort. Tears had long since streamed down her face, but they had done so in heart wrenching silence.

The radio clicked on.

What?

Luella turned to the radio that was next to Eugene's bed. It was on, and she certainly had not turned it on. Recognizing the song, Luella was hasty to turn the tune off, and did not completely register that her hand had to go through an intense cold spot to complete its task.

After the radio was silenced, Luella returned to her dismal ruminations. As her right hand continued to cling to the comforter, she sent her left to attempt to wipe away her tears.

The radio turned back on.

Luella turned her tear-filled eyes to the radio once more. The thing must be broken. After all, no one had come in or touched _anything_ for two years. Luella's personal request. She had wanted it to be in the same manner as he had left it when he returned home.

That thought caused Luella to hiccup slightly as tears continued to stream down her face. She wanted to shut out her ears and these depressing thoughts as a song she knew only in passing kept playing.

Eugene watched his mother from next to his radio, a frown on his face and a river of tears coming from his eyes. He did not want to see her like this, so sad and so broken, and yet so unwilling to let her emotions out. Naturally, the woman he had come to view as his mother had been just as emotional as he; and all too willing to let the entire world know what was on her mind and heart.

The woman who sat on his bed, holding at a comforter and crying silent tears, was breaking his heart.

He turned the radio up.

"…say goodbye…" the radio sang softly as the volume somehow increased. Luella was doing her best to ignore it as the music swayed softly through the room. All she wanted was for her son to be alive. She wanted to wake up from this nightmare and hold her Eugene in her arms.

She was far passed disillusioned; however, she wanted to hold onto some hope. She, however, could find none.

A soft breeze tickled at her right elbow, and seemed to have enough force to it to gently raise her from the bed she had been sitting on. Luella, so tired already from fighting with her conflicting and raging emotions, allowed it to happen. In the back of her mind, she was aware that _something_ was happening, though without proper brain function, she could not determine what.

The breeze began to sway Luella back and forth, and though the temperature of the breeze was cold, she felt a budding warmth from inside, akin to the feeling one receives when a long-lost loved one that had been reunited after a long time apart. She allowed herself to sway, and—for the first time—took in her surroundings.

_Sitting ... bedroom_

Eugene's room had not been the same since he had left it, as she had led herself to believe. Dust had gathered everywhere, and the PK explosion that Oliver had undergone after discovering Eugene's death had left everything in quite disarray.

_She ... hand_

The breeze played across the back of her left hand, causing her to drop the comforter she had been holding. She did not move to pick it up, she simply allowed herself to keep swaying as she truly observed Gene's room.

His closet door was open, and his bed untidy. Books littered the floor and the lamp was knocked over in an unsightly fashion.

_She ... over_

Luella shuddered as she noticed that she had dragged his comforter to the middle of the room and that she had not bothered to turn on a light. As her shoulders finally gave away, she began to sob quietly. Not silently, yet still quietly.

_And ... understand_

Eugene watched as his mother finally began to let the tears and the gut wrenching sobs that came with them truly come free. The sobs grew quickly until she was wailing like a baby. But still, Eugene kept her moving. He could not let her stand still. No, not for a moment.

_Mama ... pain_

Though the song had it slightly reversed, Eugene was glad this song had come on the radio. His mother needed to hear this.

_Life's ... same_

Luella sobbed her heart out as the force on her kept her moving. She was not fearful of this force, rather, she was openly grieving. For the first time in the two years she had known about her son's passing, she openly wept, allowing the wall of pain she had begun to build around herself come crashing down. The only thing that had kept her out of comatose was a disillusioned hope that Oliver had been wrong and Oliver himself. He had still needed her.

_And ... goodbye_

Luella bent her head, as though she were seeking comfort from a person in front of her. She could feel the breeze begin to play with her hair, as though stroking her head in a comforting manner.

She was grateful for it as she sobbed.

_It's ...cry_

She sobbed. She wailed. She let out all of the pain she had been feeling ever since she had been told, and all of the depression she had felt after seeing Eugene's body in England. She wept heavily.

_Come ... you,_

"And I will try," the boy sang along with the song softly, though his mother could not hear his attempted words of comfort.

Eugene kept patting his mother's head and kept her moving. It was as much comfort as a dead boy could offer his mother. He wanted to try to offer her that much, at least.

"How can I help you to say goodbye?"

Luella took a few ragged breaths. She needed them as she cried, and she had already begun severe hiccupping. Though as her cries took a minute break, she could have sworn that she had heard a very familiar voice sing the last line to her.

"_How can I help you to say goodbye…"_

The ghostly whisper registered immediately in Luella's mind. It was not Oliver's voice, for his had become different over the years and had never been so light an airy. It was, however, very similar, to a certain twin.

Luella sobbed harder, yet this time, it was not just in grief. It was also relief. And a hint of fear. Many emotions jumbled themselves around inside the grieving mother and expressed themselves through tears and a repeated phrase.

"Eugene, you already have," she whispered to the air, barely aware that her deceased son was listening. He leaned down and kissed her forehead, as he had outranked her in height before his untimely death. It was his own way of saying what his mother was trying to tell him now.

"I love you.

"Goodbye."

_**14AmyChan: *throws handkerchiefs at all of the readers* I'M SORRY FOR MAKIN YOU GUYS CRAII!**_

_**Luella: *is crying***_

_**Gene: *is crying***_

_**14AmyChan: *panicking***_

_**Noll: *glares at audience* If any of you were wondering which song Chan-san used, it is How Can I Help You Say Goodbye sung by Patty Loveless**_

_**14AmyChan: PLEASE REVIEW! *tosses more handkerchiefs***_


End file.
